fun




It's a Dog's Life


So you might as well enjoy it
Lessons in Assertiveness

by Sparky, the Wonder Dog, a/k/a Dr. Sparkus T. Mutt
edited by P.V. Alvarado


Canine Cannibal


Dear Dr. Mutt,


Whenever my master barbecues, he usually gives me a bite or two from the grill. However, yesterday he put the strangest looking meat in my plate. Of course, I gobbled it up fast because it smelled real good and I didn't want the cat to get it.

But then he said something that made my fur crawl!

"I guess you like hot dogs, eh, Ruff?" he said. All of a sudden, I wasn't hungry anymore. I gulped real hard and put my paws over my eyes and whimpered in disbelief.

Now I can't sleep for worrying. That hot dog did taste real good! Am I a cannibal, Dr. Mutt?

Mortified in Monroe


Dear Mortified,

Not to worry. Humans have the strangest names for their food, and "hot dog" is just one example. You may not have noticed the shape before you ate it, but the "hot dog" is shaped like a Dachshund, which is nicknamed "Weiner Dog" or "sausage dog." When humans cook it, it gets hot and thus you have a "HOT dog." But believe me, though the human hot dog contains many things, rest assured that canine is not one of them. So relax. You're not a cannibal!


Sparky




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