opinion

Scarlet Letters...

Hey, don't get me wrong! I like Carnival as much as the guy next door. Yet, I'm not a party animal --- call me an independent voter (nah, just teasing). Despite all the agnostic bravado a catholic sinner like me can muster, I'm still afraid of going to hell. But not because I'm going to indulge in the sensual pleasures of these days, no sir; it's just that my faith in the future is running thin; you know what they say, Hell is all that's left when hope flees. And with all the conservative media hype about Mel Gibson's film about Christ, this Lent's theme is truly going to be about repentance and reflection.

Or not? Back here in our little corner of sinner paradise, most can give a rat's... behind. The queen's stubborn jewelry during coronation, the whole octopus-like arm waving dancing show, the cheap flag and fireworks --- business as usual. Drink and forget was, is and will be the motto for these celebrations until Judgment Day. But unlike previous hanta carnivals and with a couple of months between us and a foreseeable judgment day (election day, that is), with Pedrito Altamiranda's La Doña as a sort of drunk chant of civil disobedience, the town bands are going to be angelical trumpets aimed to convert the repentant swing vote.

But do queens exercise authority? It's a good thing to ponder while you look into the dire future. They dance, dance and dance and nobody gives a damn. It's just another pretty face that gets dumped into oblivion's gutter after Carnival season. But their boozy once-a-year dictatorship may give rise to reflections about authority in Panama.

All leadership in Panama seems to be paradoxical or, in the best of cases, cynically party-oriented. The governing style of our Madam President is very much like Carnival Queen Debbie I's --- except that the latter isn't about pleasing political parties but about pleasing party animals. Well aware that Aristotle once said that man was deep down inside a political animal, Madam President works the opposite way --- she's all about pleasing party animals, her party's animals. Our president waves hello, she dances (with Afú and many others), wears expensive jewelry and goes everywhere with her court of princes, princesses and courtiers, whose glamor and combined looks are worthy of only MAD magazine pin-ups.

But let's not forget that Lil' Madam President wants a little respect before she leaves for good. She wants to be recognized as a lady. She thinks that it's the media's fault that she isn't.

We cannot deny some simple facts of life. For our classy Madam President, the trip to Rainiero-fairy land was an eye opener --- Monaco's banquets, dances and regal protocol were a Cinderella story come true for the simple country girl who lived under the autocratic machismo of Arnulfo Arias. He's dead, and like a good widow she wants to enjoy life, and indeed she has! She remarried (and divorced) and has even tried to enslave her former political celeb husband in his afterlife (wherever that might be) by attempting to declare his memory her property. Thank God I don't remember him --- with all the help she's giving Alemán, she might devise a thought tax on memories of her former husband to finance her candidate.

Debbie I might be queen for a few days, but Mireyita will be queen for quite awhile still.

But what does this mean? Even if Alemán loses the election, she can still dance, prance and kick everyone in the rear. Call it a rightful retribution carried out by the appropriate agent (the mob's definition of what a nemesis is) --- and she will turn into Panama's nemesis if the popular vote doesn't follow her bidding. Fraud may be right around the corner. Everyone knows it. Even the electoral magistrates who are scared out of their wits. That's why they aren't doing squat. This time around they're not in control, Mireya is. And because she's queen, she also has a few tricks under her skirt.

The whole Quinta Papeleta debacle is the president's wild card.

Don't get me wrong again, I'm 100 percent for the initiative but I'm growing suspicious of her support. It's a common political maxim that the enemy of my enemy is my friend and the 2020 Forum and the Arnulfistas have found an enemy they both like to hate: The Electoral Tribunal. Arnulfistas are not happy with its pronouncements regarding the whole Endara ad debacle. The 2020 people are not happy with all the runaround about the Quinta Papeleta. So they are allies or a sort --- yet to what purpose? The Arnulfistas are murky in their position on a constituent assembly; when all the fuss started, they weren't that supportive of the idea. It got delayed. Now they are for it.

Why? Because although the extra investment to pop the question on Election Day (less than a million bucks) will turn out to be about six times more expensive if delayed, that delightful setback is designed to marry the idea of a new constitution with a "let's make the canal bigger and better regardless of everyone" referendum.

If the canal referendum is done separately, it won't pass. There's nothing wrong in modernizing the canal but modernity and efficiency don't equate to stepping on poor peasants and flooding their lands regardless of irreversible ecological damage.

That's needlessly cruel. Next thing, the ACP will turn to murdering Dalmatians to make fur coats and stuff.

Also, to modernize doesn't mean to mortgage. The Canal's feudal authority is eager to pledge future revenues as collateral to make the scheme appealing to investors. But what they know (and are not telling) is that debt payment these days is no easy game. The government is highly leveraged and the only financial exhaust pipe left unclogged is canal revenue. If they spend that to favor the same local construction tycoons the same old names will purchase more luxurious homes while the state drowns in ever more debt. Add that to an imminent Social Security meltdown and Panama's future finances could look pretty dire.

But who gives a damn? In the land of Queen Mireya, the canal is king and God is nowhere in sight. Perhaps we might catch a glimpse of Him in Mel Gibson's new movie. But don't expect a concrete proposal anytime soon. For that we'll have to wait for "The Passion Part II: Panama gets crucified."


E. Arthur Fisher is a Panamanian writer, author of three books; his most recent work, "Diario en Verso" is a poetry collection. You can read his regular column "Scarlet Letters" twice a month in The Panama News.





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