opinion

On courtesy and smiles
by Silvio Sirias

In our era, courtesy is the object of constant eulogies. I hear these in private conversations as well as in the media. Kindness and gentility have died, people keep saying.

I don’t believe that.

Nevertheless, there are occasions, and often, I admit, when I’d welcome the smallest gesture that indicates that a person, if only momentarily, has placed the well-being of another before his or her own.

I especially wish this when I’m caught in one of Panama City’s notorious traffic jams. Whenever my wife --- who is usually behind the steering wheel --- stops to allow another vehicle to enter the flow of traffic, if the recipient of her thoughtfulness fails to acknowledge the gift, half irritated and half in jest, I exclaim, “Hey, where’s our wave?” (Credit for that line, of course, goes to Seinfeld.)

On the rare occasions when drivers signal their gratitude, my wife and I wave back, large grins on our faces.

And that’s something I’ve noticed, courteous acts usually trigger big smiles.

And a recent incident confirmed, for me at least, that chivalry lives on—this in spite of its much proclaimed demise.

Pedestrians in Central America -- in comparison to the United States --- have few rights. For instance, when one crosses the street without the benefit of a traffic light (and frequently a green signal is no guarantee of safe passage) one has to be prepared to dodge vehicles: the vast majority of drivers seem intent on making it to their destinations with as few stops as possible. Because of this, crossing a street in Panama City is, in my eyes, akin to playing Frogger --- with the frog being the pedestrian. (Frogger, for those who may not know, is one of the earliest video games; in it, the player has to get a frog across a five-lane highway without the poor amphibian getting squished.)

As I write this, I realize that now the idea of crossing a street in Panama City must seem terrifying to the outsider; but the truth is that this enterprise can be quite interesting, and it’s certainly one that brings on an adrenaline rush.

A couple of weeks ago, I was crossing a heavily-trafficked, one-way, two-lane street near my home when, after waiting a couple of minutes for the steady flow of vehicles to subside, I spotted an upcoming gap. I crossed the lane closest to me and stopped midway through the street to allow the last vehicle of the herd --- a motorcycle --- to pass. Soon, though, I became concerned when the driver started to slow down. I waved my arm across my waist a few times, inviting him to pass. Instead, right before reaching me, the motorcycle came to a complete halt.

Startled, I looked straight at the motorcyclist who, fortunately for me, wore a helmet without a visor. The handsome young man broke into a friendly grin and said, “Por favor, señor, pase usted.”

The driver’s kind gesture so startled me that I immediately started to chuckle, thanked him --- and waved, of course --- as I finished crossing the street. As I continued on my errand, I became caught in the recollection of the driver’s selflessness --- and the warmth of his humanity accompanied me along the way.

I had advanced a couple of blocks before I noticed people staring at me, and then smiling as we crossed paths. It was at that point that the ripple effect of the young man’s act brought me back to a luminous reality --- throughout that stretch of my journey, unknowingly, I had been smiling, to myself, touched by the radiance of another person’s kindness.

Silvio Sirias resides and writes in Panama. For more information, visit his website at http://www.silviosirias.com