opinion

What made the difference
by Erica Mutoh

“Erica, do you remember when we visited Panama, a long while ago?” my dad asked as we drove around beautiful Torrance, California.

“Yeah, I think so.” But actually, I couldn’t remember at all.

I didn’t know what my dad was trying to get to so I just went along with the conversation. I had no idea that the next words would change my life forever.

“Well, we might be moving there.” This was nothing close to what I expected him to say. I thought he was going to tell me a funny story in exchange for accompanying him to the hardware store on that Sunday afternoon.

I was certainly not prepared for such nerve-wrecking news. I didn’t know what to say. My mind went blank; and then, suddenly, images of my friends and all the great times we would have in the future sped through my mind.

Immediately, I knew we would be moving. If my father hadn’t been sure, he never would’ve mentioned it.

The idea of moving affected me more than I thought it would. It was emotionally draining to have to accept the fact that, come June, I would be living in a different country. Defiantly, I decided that I would only move to Panama on the condition that I would be able to visit Los Angeles, my hometown, every summer. But, the harder I tried to hold on, the worse I felt about moving. It didn’t help that the year seemed to be coming to an end faster than I thought it would. And before I knew it, I was on my way to Panama.

We moved to Panama from my home in sunny California because my dad had bought a shrimp farm. Why a shrimp farm? Or, better yet, why Panama? Who knows? And, to be honest, I still don’t know and I’ve been living here for over two years now. Yet, as much as I hated to leave California, I was somewhat excited to be in a new country: a totally different world and lifestyle. I guess it’s the wild and adventurous blood I inherited from my dad.

For a while I was undecided about how I felt. I was torn between accepting a new, exciting life and holding on to the perfect one I had been living.

I knew that moving to Panama would be a great experience for me, but once I arrived I just wanted to get out, to return to California. In my narrow-minded point of view, I came to believe that Panama was a horrible place to be, let alone live. This was only because I was trying to find something wrong with everything I saw and experienced. And as much as I wanted to have fun, I was stuck in the past.

One day, I stared at myself in the mirror and I could see the toll such thinking had taken on me. My negative outlook had become my worst enemy, and I had been letting it win --- it was obvious. I looked sad, not my usual, cheerful self. It was only when I looked into the eyes of my reflection that I realized that I had to snap out of whatever I was going through and get back to reality. From that day on, I convinced myself to believe that there are good and bad things in every place, but I should respect every feature, good or bad, and learn to love Panama for what it is.

With this new mindset, I quickly began to enjoy my new home. I’m proud to say that I’ve taken full advantage of being here: I learned how to scuba dive, witnessed sea turtles come to shore to lay eggs, and I’ve even visited different countries in Central America. And these are only a handful of the things that have helped me appreciate what life in Panama has to offer.

At the end of my first school year, the time finally came for me to take my trip back to California. I was so excited; I had many stories to share. That summer, while telling my friends about my adventures in Panama, I realized that I was living life to the fullest --- at least for a 15 year-old. I had experiences that none of my friends even dreamed of --- and all that time I had been wishing for a miracle to stop my family from coming here. The real miracle had been the move. That miracle changed my life, for the better. Because of the move, I’ve become a completely new person: worldly, open-minded, and appreciative.

Although the decision to move to Panama was not mine, I did have a choice on one matter: how I would live once I arrived. I’m grateful that I have been given this opportunity because this has been, by far, the most rewarding experience in my life. Not only because of what I have been able to do, but also because of what I’ve been able to learn. This move was a test of character, one that has taught me the most important lesson of all --- it’s all about attitude.

Erica Mutoh is a senior at Balboa Academy